Wednesday, April 13, 2016

Friends or the Lack of...

Is it everyone or is it just me that seems to have a lack of friends that want to get together every once in a while? Should I always be the one doing the suggesting even though my last suggestion was declined with an excuse or even accepted with nobody showing up... oh well, how bad is hanging out alone anyways?

I understand that people are not always free, but if they decline an invitation, they should at least make an effort to reschedule it...if they cared to that is. I contacted one of my best friends a couple of months ago and told her we should hang out for her birthday, but she apologized saying she was sick and that she would be going to perform Umrah. Two months have passed and she has not suggested another outing even though she posts pictures of outings she has with other friends. I am just tired of being the person to reach out and would appreciate being reached out to for a change.

I have called another one of my friends two weeks ago and she told me she is in a call and she would call me back. I am still waiting for her to return my call...

Another friend who rarely does get in touch and the last time we hung out was five months ago, and he said we should hang out more often... though it seems like he was just being polite at the time contacted me and asked me where I had disappeared to even though I had disappeared because he made no effort to keep contact and eventually, I had stopped as well. I knew he probably contacted me because he wanted something and I was right, and he followed-up with me the following day to see what had happened with his request. He had also suggested we meet up and set a date and did not show up. This is the type of person, I will no longer be trusting, and will no longer agree to meet up with because I will not endure another no show. I had also invited another friend to this outing, and she cancelled on the same day as he did which is just ridiculous. 

In the past couple of months, the only friends I saw are the ones I traveled with, and I barely saw them any time before that, and now that the travels are over, I also doubt that I will see them. Next time, I shall just travel alone and stay alone, for there is no need for company when you only receive it overseas. 

The last friend has been going through a phase of slight depression, so I suggested that we get pancakes to cheer him up. He told me that he was travelling for the next couple of weeks and did not even suggest that we reschedule. Well, maybe it is my fault for trying to be nice and wanting to uplift people's moods.

So there it goes, 26 is usually an age where people are surrounded by friends, and here I am surrounded by my own thoughts which are not too bad because at least they can flow without any interruptions from people who bring up things and thus my thoughts have to think about what they are talking about to be able to engage in conversation. I think I am just not a people's person which intrigues me because sometimes I am very social especially with strangers who seem to approach me and want to talk, but at other times, I do not even want to see people. 

I do not blame people that I have a lack of close friends, I blame myself. I think I have high expectations that are never met and thus I am disappointed and no longer pursue the friendship or maybe I just need to meet new people with new interests and that I am intrigued to speak to.