Friday, May 20, 2016

Googling Arabs: Common Stereotypes

As Arabs we tend to stereotype each other and we have created a hierarchy of power and respect depending on which Arab country you come from, so here are the results of Google-ing each Arab nationality and a commentary to go with each. The commentary comes after each picture just to help you match them up.


  No, just Zidane, the rest are slow

    Obviously they are either bored out of their minds on their small island or are running away from the alcoholics that conquer their island at weekends.

    Isn't it enough that they speak French? Why do you expect them to speak Spanish as well? And yes, they do eat pork, but only with their hands.

   Yes, Iraqis have guns, support isis and hate America, so stop messing with them.

   Yes, of course Jordanians like their king which is why they are desperate to go anywhere even Vietnam.

  Yes, they work at Fox News, but for all other jobs they import cheap labor. Alcohol? They don't actually drink it, but they just buy it to support Bahrain's poor economy.

 No, why would Kuwaitis work when they get paid by the government. They just go on cheap vacations to Asia using that money.

 No, they don't speak Arabic, they are originally French, but have been conquered by Arabs until the France freed them and taught them their mother tongue which they are still have not perfected because they are too busy celebrating holidays and partying all year round.

 Only Libyans that speak Italian like America. And they don't have to pay for electricity thus they always have money for booze.

 Google does not even recognize Mauritanians and keeps referring to the Island people instead. Oh well, most of us don't even know it's an Arab country anyways.

 Yes, Egyptian gods exist and they are the ones eating all the pork.

 Obviously, they can afford nicer vacations than their Kuwaiti counterparts and spend the excess money on booze.

 This is seriously the only option that came up. Well, it depends where they are living because apparently none of them are enjoying Lebanon.

Yes, they get free money and they used it to buy London, so they practically own it all, and your conspiracy theories did not go in vain for these are the people who voted for Sadiq Khan.

No, why in the world would they speak Arabic? And why does it bother you if they get sunburnt or not, are they asking you for sunscreen?

Yes, they want to come to Canada to eat pork and celebrate Easter, so let them in. They don't speak Arabic or any other language, so you can teach them your language and it will be their mother tongue.

 Tunisians do everything, you don't need to resort to Google.

     They marry foreigners because they are almost extinct and there aren't enough of them. And stop looking for them in Dubai, they are already extinct there.

 People kept asking what Yemenis chew until it became banned; curiosity kills. Obviously, they need to carry daggers to protect themselves from creepily curious people like yourself.